MBL 2.0
Jan 12, 2017 | permalink
Back in 2011, we held a "oneness" retreat in the June heat of Ahmedabad. It ended up being amazing. The next year, we did it again. It turned into Moved by Love (a la ServiceSpace-India). Now, there are monthly retreats, with overflowing demand every month. All alumni are typically so moved they want to help further, and sure enough, projects start to emerge and thousands of ripples began spreading across the country. Instead of starting with an intent of creating impact, then building project plans and eventually arriving at inner transformation, this was the opposite. We started with our own inner transformation, in a circle, and that led to lots of projects and impact. Because it was done in this way, it is powered by love instead of money -- and continues to be so.
This week, bunch of anchors decided to sneak in a 2-day "MBL 2.0" retreat. It was very energizing. One emergent theme was "building an engagement spectrum for transformative volunteerism". Another was around a "Failure Club", where we encourage outrageous experiments in compassion that are bound to fail (but who knows, they just might succeed :)). At night, we had a skit that Khushmita had dreamed up in her 10-day meditation retreat :) (complete with Nimo doing some classic impressions of me, that had everyone rolling in laughter). We did a lot of work, but underneath it, there was a palpable sense of gratitude for our deepening noble friendship.
A Letter From My Mom -- In Gujarati!
Jan 11, 2017 | permalink
My parents landed in India this morning, and it was so sweet of everyone here receive them with so much love. In a way, they are everyday folks -- but they are everyday folks with a lot of blessings from many. And well deserved merits borne of consistent, small acts of love.
They got tagged with plane tickets, so my mom decided that she would hold a heart of service on the whole plane ride. One thing she decided to do was respond to Jay's email about starting Awakin Sydney -- and she wrote this beautiful letter in Gujarati.
I was very touched by the letter, and another reflection she wrote (in Gujarati) on how Awakin Circles have changed her. She writes so poetically in Gujarati! When Ragu heard about these writings, he joked that he wanted the original copies of this letter for KarmaBay (ServiceSpace version of eBay :)) -- and my mom is indeed saving it for him. :)
Beyond that, it has also ignited a series of conversations between my mom and I, about writing in Gujarati as an expression of her service. As a teenager, my mom was a gold-medalist in college and a published author of various Gujarati books and articles -- but given the culture at the time, she had to do it via a pen name and eventually stop. However, I've been nudging her to reignite that natural talent of hers, in service to inner transformation -- so expect more soon. :)
It Felt A Bit Like The Mafia :)
Jan 9, 2017 | permalink
It was morning, 9AM. All these cars lined up outside our retreat center, but none of them entered. They were waiting for their leader to arrive. :) First of all, it’s amazing that they all woke up so early, and on top of that, to have this kind of discipline. One gets curious. :)
They are hundred elected leaders of a network of colleges with a population of 850,000 students. Within a couple day notice, they can galvanize an army of 10 thousand volunteers. They run the college. Their top-down leadership style is evident, but today, Jayesh-bhai, Anarben and I are engaging with them. We rarely do such events together, but this event warranted the full fire power. :)
To set some context, before our formal time together, some of them were telling me stories of how they have slapped their professors, burned down buildings, changed the exams schedules according to their whims, and even beat up the chancellor. Of course, they have their own rationales for violence and feel justified in doing their bit for the social change they wish for. :)
Jayeshbhai started by setting the context as he always does -- he uses skillful words but his energetic aikido is even more masterful. Anarben introduced me, and then I shared: "If you want to be daring, wonderful. But first we must explore what is truly gutsy. Violence is nowhere nearly as gutsy as love." Cue Pancho stories. Some personal stories. Everyday stories with 21-day challenge. Then, Anarben explored some edges of leadership -- things that they had never spoken about. All three of us were in effortless harmony. Throughout the time, pin-drop silence.
With the field set, we then let go of the reins. We asked them to take over the mic. Given that these are public leaders, they had no problem with that. :) One of them spoke about doing acts of kindness in his village; another spoke about treating women as our sisters (earlier I had confronted them about how they were 100 men in the room and not a single woman); another spoke about reconnecting with their roots in the villages. When some of them spoke, others made fun of them -- which was a sign that they all felt comfortable. If we sensed things slightly going off track, we'd nudge it back. Stories continued. The ambiance kept building.
At one point, their main leader goes up and says, "Hey guys, I want make a public vow in front of all of you today. I'm going to stop drinking." Whoa. In response to a bunch of smirks in the audience, he said, "No really. That's why I'm saying it in front of all of you. I dare you to catch me drinking from this point." Then, he goes one step further: "I dare you guys to step up to the plate. I'm going to pass around this plate. Put all your cigarettes, drugs and alcohol in it." Coming from him, it wasn't a request -- but an order. :) Perhaps some might've thought that it was a scripted thing -- but it was actually completely spontaneous! He goes on to explain, "Look, a leader is only as strong as his army. If we are all doped out, we can't do anything, and I can't do anything." And so the plate went around and people emptied their pockets.
To conclude, after 3 hours, Jayeshbhai passed around a Smile Deck, and each of them picked a card and read the act of kindness idea that was printed on it. They each decided to do their act that very day. They were even keen to do a 21-day kindness challenge. Another leader stood up and offered unexpected gratitude at the end -- "I can honestly say this on behalf of everyone, I don't think we've ever had a day like this in our life. Can we do this once every month?"
At one point, I had asked them about future career directions, and 100% of them raised their hands for politics. These are the next generation's leaders, and yet no one has held space with them for a deep exploration on leadership, love or transformation. A bit sad. But how amazing that people like Jayeshbhai and Anarben are able to build such bridges.
We all served food together, while I continued to be amazed at the extent of their mafia-like modus operandi -- "Chief, I have exams at 1AM. Can I go?" "Nah, just stay." "But exam?" "I'll take care of it." LOL. :)
Meditating With 43 Friends, For 10 Days! :)
Jan 8, 2017 | permalink
Forty-three of us went together for a 10-day Vipassana meditation retreat in Igatpuri, at the start of the new year. The campus organizers said they had never seen such a large group of friends voluntarily sign up to do a course together! When we finished on Day 10, many said it was a life-changing experience. Some first-timers shared classic stories that made all of us laugh to no end. In the end, most of us returned back into the world a little bit lighter. And grateful.
At one point, I spotted a beautiful bodhi leaf fallen on the ground. With great joy, I remembered how Guri was once meditating under the Bodhi tree where Buddha was enlightened -- and a leaf fell and swayed perfectly into her lap. She kept it as a sacred reminder to cultivate. And then, for one of my birthdays, she gifted me that leaf -- and with it, the spirit of cultivation.
I bowed to the kindness of so many blessings that gives me the will to meditate in this way.
Feature In The Hindu
Jan 7, 2017 | permalink
After several events in Delhi, I ended up agreeing to do an interview -- mostly as a courtesy to the organizers. It ended up getting featured in The Hindu in Delhi (and later across India). Interviews often get edited down for easier reading, which can lead to quotes getting taken out of context. Fortunately, their editing wasn't too extensive and they printed most of my words. :)
Ever since I was a kid I would always ask the big questions of life. What’s the purpose of this whole charade? What happens when one dies? What is the motive for action? Often, I didn’t find the answers I was looking for, so I would start investigating. Seventeen was a turning point in my life, when my spiritual search came into the foreground. I was playing a lot of tennis (secretly hoping to turn pro), I took advanced academic classes and was already a junior in college, and I was en route to start studying computer science at UC Berkeley. My first (and only) job was as a software engineer at Sun Microsystems but my prime focus had shifted to dealing with my unanswered existential questions. The journey still continues to this day, but where previously I was looking for answers, I now look to dissolve the questions.
Farmers Retreat In Coimbatore
Dec 27, 2016 | permalink
It is always a joy to see Ragu and Nisha. And especially so at their farm in Coimbatore.
For the one day that I was there, they held a "Farmers Retreat" -- which I'd say was the first-ever ServiceSpace retreat with farmers! It was so awesome to see their community in action, and learn from their perspectives. So many of them have done some really courageous work in bucking the societal trends, and innovating in the difficult field of farming. All our food, for instance, was not only made from hyper-local fruits and vegetable, but even the bread was homemade -- in a homemade oven! Yes, super-ultra-hyper local, or whatever you call this. :) (On the right is Ramesh launching his new food project, by piloting his food on us!)
Although some of the farmers knew each other on a 1-on-1 basis, it was the first time that all of them were coming together in a many-to-many context. And it was especially awesome to see all the kids join in during the 3-steps-and-a-bow conclusion.
Ragu also gave a thoughtful presentation on 'synergy', which is worthy of a deeper dive:
Synergy is an emergent phenomenon in which a chain of a certain type is stronger than the sum of the strengths of all its links, including its weakest links. In the worlds of inanimate matter and every form of living beings - plants, microorganisms, insects and animals, when the right entities combine together under the right circumstances, synergy is automatic. Except human beings. In the case of human beings, synergy is not automatic but is present as a potential and a choice. So the coming together of the right people does not automatically create synergy. Synergy emerges among people when the synchrony among them crosses a certain threshold. This crossing of threshold changes the state of being, like water becoming vapour after hundred degrees. This is a result of explicitly, deliberately and consistently aligning ourselves.
It was great to see Aum growing up too. He was bit on the skinny side this time, since he had just fasted for five days to recover from a sickness (he believes in natural healing!). But that didn't stop him from showing me all these card tricks. :) On this trip, I discovered that Aum loves pens. So I took out a pen that Swara had given me and gifted it to him -- and immediately, he says, "Can I give one to her too?" He ran up to get one. When I thanked him, he played it off: "I wasn't really being generous. I just don't have space for so many pens!" :)
Damp, But No Sorrow
Dec 26, 2016 | permalink
Today, on Ishwar-Kaka's death anniversary, I found myself reflecting on death.
This photo, from a few months ago, has an inspiring feel. It's the photo of Arun Dada at his beloved wife's funeral. Jignasha had sent it to me, mentioning that there was no sense of sorrow (or tears) at the funeral.
When asked about this, Arun Dada responded, "My heart is a little damp, but no sorrow."
Accountants And Shiva Temples In Kumbakonam
Dec 25, 2016 | permalink
I came in late last night to Kumbakonam, to address the elected leaders of Institute of Chartered Accountants of India. About a million CA students pass through their institution every year. Our rich interaction set off a field for a ripples, and the Q&A went on for so long that they had to cut it off.
At one point, one person asked a curious question: "I'm so busy with work, that I have almost no time for my wife and kids. I can be kind to others, but I regret that I don't have a connection with my son. Will kindness help change my relationship to my family?" I responded with the story of Saavji-bhai (one of the biggest diamond merchants in the world) and how his relationship with his son transformed through small acts of service.
My main take-away for the council was: "You've built a road on which you're sharing content about financial accounting. Can you use that road to transport other kinds of content?" Ultimately, their response was, "You tell us how, and we'll do it." For one, all their students are getting the Indian version of the Smile Decks -- and Sheetal-ben is working on a plan to engage their community.
Later on, walking around Kumbakonam, one quickly learns the town is known for its filter coffee :) and Shiva temples. It's considered a very sacred town.
As I was leaving, I also met Steve -- the owner of the space where I was staying. He used to fail in school, which prompted him to give up on "regular intelligence" and focus more on "divine intelligence". That led him to start hotel projects that would uplift the local economy -- since he had a rule of not buying anything outside of a 15 kilometer radius! All around, you could see sacred relics and ancient art (each with their story!) that were not just expensive but impossible to find. To almost every question about its origins, his response was: "I don't find it. It finds me." Quite literally, people come and give him things -- including collector's items worth millions. Everyone has some excuse or another, but he says that the real reason is karma. :)
While walking through his property, he points to the deer garden. "See those deer? They're all rescued after car accidents." He had a story like that for every corner. It was a labor of love. As I was leaving, he kindly gave me his book, that is also a gift for everyone who visits the President of India, and said, "We'll meet again." It would be pointless to ask him specifics -- because he didn't seem like the kind of guy who kept a calendar. :)
On the way to my next destination, Coimbatore, I called up my parents in the US.
My mom tells me, "Kombakonam?"
"Yes. You've heard of it," I answered.
"Yes, that's where Mota had his spiritual awakening." (Mota is the spiritual teacher of my grandfather, who married my parents, and is considered to be awakened by many in India.)
"Really? Kombakonam?"
"Yes."
As Steve would say, maybe my trip was pre-ordained. :)
Pondering In Pondicherry
Dec 24, 2016 | permalink
I've had a bunch of deja-vu moments recently. On the face of it, I've had loads of activity. But underneath, there's an increasing suspicion that I'm just on a joy-ride in the passenger seat. :)
Take a recent example. Lalit hosted me for a talk two days. He was quite moved and tells the current Governor of Pondicherry, Kiran Bedi (of 'Doing Time, Doing Vipassana' fame), that she should meet me. Incidentally, my friend Rajeev from Malaysia happens to be visiting Pondicherry, giving a talk that Kiran had requested; he is elated that I'm local too, and also tells me that he shows my Harker talk at all his trainings. We all meet for lunch the next day. I ask Sujatha to join; she's doing her PhD in game theory from IIT Madras, and it turns out her work could be very useful for some ideas that Kiran Bedi is pursuing.
Afterwards, Lalit (who was lovingly escorting me on his scooter!) asks me, "Where are you staying in Kombakonam?" This is a small city, that most people outside of Tamil Nadu haven't heard of.
I said, "Not sure, why?"
"I have a friend who has the best resort in Kombakonam -- you must stay there."
"Appreciate that, Lalit -- but my hosts have already made the arrangements."
"No, no, trust me. I'll arrange for transport. Tell me where are you staying?"
I'm clearly not going cancel, but he insists, so I look it up. It ends up being the same hotel that Lalit's friend owns! And that night, it so happens that his friend is going to be in town (he rarely comes there). That guy, Steve, is an entirely remarkable story in himself.
Another example. I see a serene, old American man walking down the street. With him is a kid in his early teens, carrying a small yellow flower. Both are walking in peace and neither are saying anything, nor feeling compelled to talk. Something about them is striking. I'm with Bala-ji, who points them out: "That's the famous author who translated Saavitri and many other teachings." Bala-ji is dropping me off to my next meeting with Sraddhalu, which turns out to be at the home of Madhav Pandit. It also turns out that Pandit-ji was Bala-ji's mentor (until he passed away). While three of us are meeting, two others walk in -- that American grandfather and kid holding the yellow flower.
It was just surreal. Not just momentarily, but for long periods. Am I walking on the street, or is the street walking in my mind? Does it matter? Who is asking the question? Then, just empty, but full.
All the pieces continue to interlock so elegantly. I'm in awe at the dance of the universe.
Feeling What The Cows Feel In Auroville
Dec 23, 2016 | permalink
Under the care of Deven and Shaalini, I arrived in Auroville today.
Had a nice talk for couple hours with a conscious community of change-makers, on the merits of ServiceSpace's three design principles: labor of love, work with what you have, and focus on small. By the end, we were all in a giant group hug, swaying to Being Kind. :)
In the evening, Uma hosted a sweet Awakin Circle. She's been hosting a local circle for a couple of years now, after she attended a powerful Awakin to Giftivism retreat few years ago. Someone had tagged her with couple thousand rupees anonymously there, and she decided to buy big pots in which she can cook for others and host Awakins -- and lo and behold, the ripple still continues.
The next morning, Manoj (my very gracious host) lovingly took me to meditate in Matrimandir. That was a special experience. It turns out, at night, the neighborhood cows stroll to the front gate of this temple and sleep there. I could feel why.
