Mar 1, 2022 | permalink
At a Bioneers conference in 2003, Holly Near came on stage and shared: "A cellist in Sarajevo went out in the square, when the bombs were dropping, and started playing his cello. Someone from the press said to him, 'Why are you out here playing the cello when the bombs are exploding?' And he said, 'Why are they dropping the bombs when I'm playing the cello?'"
Then she sang a song that sent chills down many spines: Planet Called Home
Feb 21, 2022 | permalink
Pods are creating some profound ripples. At its core are volunteers, and this is a emblematic note that we recently saw ...
"Volunteering in this Pod is a profoundly humbling process. Instead of holding a concept with intellectual rigidity, the practice is to hold the spectrum of perspectives with an empathic fluidity. So every time I read another podmate's reflections with a beginner's mind, I invite myself to expand my perspective and see life from the lens of another. It is very humbling to practice discovering the goodness of others and their views, and it's a blessing because I'm released from the prison of my own knowing!"
Jan 16, 2022 | permalink
What a joy to be reminded of the power of noble friendship through these icons of compassion:
Jan 12, 2022 | permalink
In talking to a friend about the state of the world, I was reminded of this graphic around the Delta variant's spread. It feels increasingly relevant even now.
Dec 31, 2021 | permalink
What a sweet note to receive from my mom on my birthday ...
"When I read the name Grace this morning, a memory flashed in my mind. 'Grace-ben' was the Christian midwife who had helped me both the time with your birth in the delivery room. In those days, relatives were not allowed in the delivery room so while your grandmother and a very compassionate neighbor waited outside, Grace or Graceben lovingly welcomed you (and later Viral) in this world. I am pretty convinced like attracts like! Around this time, so many years back, both you and I were held by Grace."
Nov 18, 2021 | permalink
Among the various conversations, I loved these three conversations with three unique mystics with gigantic hearts of service:
Oct 11, 2021 | permalink
Some reflections from our Awakin Circle today on Marc Lesser's post on the juggle between accepting circumstances and fighting for change:
In response to Ifeoma's request for articulation, here are some words to the flowchart above ...
I love the Serenity prayer that invites us to find the "serenity to accept things I can't change, courage to change what I can, and wisdom to know the difference." In practice, though, we can ignore the service we are called to and start fighting for things that aren't ours to change. It's hard to find that "wisdom" in each moment.
When we accept circumstances, we might just be acting lazy and escaping. Or we might just lose all ground and become a punching bag for others to grow in negativity. In between those, how might we find the sweet spot of responding with equanimity and poise? Strong back, but a soft heart.
Similarly, when we are fighting for change, it can be a reaction to our internal frustration, anger and impatience. Still, in anger, there is a meaningful element of dissatifaction; if we can see that everyone is continually on a pathway of that dissatisfaction, it can lead to compassion. If it isn't in a wholesome proportion, though, it can lead to self righteousness and a downward spiral of hating the other person or world view. In between those, how might we find the sweet spot of responding to dissatisfaction but with compassion? Strong back, but a soft heart.
When acceptance with equanimity comes together with a heart of compassion, an act of service naturally blossoms.
Given our imperfect perception, though, even our acts of service can be easily hijacked by the devious manipulations of the ego. We can start to think that we are special, right, and gifted; we get greedy for change to happen on our timeline; we want to get credit for what we do. As insurance around this tendency, it helps to remember that we are not serving to help or fix others, but rather to transform ourselves through the process of performing that small act of kindness. Then, we are effortlessly grateful that we *get* to give, and we trust in grace to deliver the outcomes as conditions ripen.
Such service at the intersection of equanimity and compassion yields a quiet kind of inner transformation that dismantles the tools of our ego. Less of me and more of we.
That field of "we" profoundly expands our capcity to serve. Because we are no longer burdening our ego with the responsibility of fixing the world, we are free to serve more. Because we are no longer sneakily transactional, our shallow bonds with others mushroom into noble friendship and afford us the resiliency to bounce back from setbacks. Because we want nothing in return, the winds of nature flow through our hollow flute to play a glorious song we never get to hear -- because we are It.
By finding the equanimity embedded in acceptance, and the compassion embedded in transformation, love is made visible. We then serve for our inner transformation, or through our very existence.
Oct 11, 2021 | permalink
[I recently hosted a couple interviews. Following one, a friend wrote to me about how one of the guests might be two-faced.]
While that has not my experience with this particular person, I do know ample people who I judge similarly -- whether they get seduced by greater power or money or fame.
Over the years, though, I've asked myself if projecting my beliefs of perfection onto others is commensurate with holding my own self up to those standards. What I've seen within me is that I judge others by their actions, but I judge myself by my intentions. I wonder how things might change if I find some parity in that judgement gap?
If I judge myself by my actions, I realize that I'm also quite imperfect -- and then would I expect that from others? If I was leading thousands of people in an organization, is it ever possible to do something that everyone judges to be a win-win? That's hard to do even within two people sometimes. :) Conversely, and perhaps more importantly, if I judge others by their intentions, that also dramatically softens my gaze. Even if I strongly oppose the action, prioritizing the other person's intention increases my capacity for offering benefit of doubt.
You mentioned the show titled "Devil's Advocate" -- that pinning people down, intellectually, about their contradictions could be a good way to open them. Personally, I wonder about the efficacy of that route, given my experience with myself. My sense is that Angel's Advocate might be much more potent, for both the receiver and giver. :)
Many years ago, I met a leader (who then went on to become one of the most powerful heads of state in the world). In our 30 minute chat, I asked him questions like what he does to hear voices outside of yes-men around him. At one point, he abruptly walked out of our conversation. He wanted to influence me, and I wanted to influence him -- and the net result was neither happened.
Sure, if one wants to build a following of cheap followers, holding strong positions and becoming a convincing lawyer for those positions is very adept. But what does that solve? Would anyone even want such a friend? I wouldn't. Surely, I like the idea of critical thought through candid dialogue, but if there isn't a larger field of friendship and trust, it just breeds hostility and polarity -- as is obvious around the world today. If we are to counteract those divides with bridge-building, "Angel's Advocates" feels lot more skilful. In the previous generation, where content was a premium, we marveled at people who were smart, brought up intellectual counter-points, and offered thought leadership. But in today's world of information overload, it's just noise.
More subtly, one of my activist friends asked a monk once, "I have all these good ideas, but no one listens to me." And the monk said, "That's because you're taking a short-cut. You first need to make them your brother/sister, by giving." That's a tricky response, :) because as we walk the path of fraternity, our connection to "good ideas" ends up being radically transformed.
That monk's path is hard and slow, but that's what Gandhi stood for. Ambedkar would frame Gandhi's approach as "tyranny of incrementalism" -- that if you wait for inner transformation in the other person (or a group), they'll keep on doing damage and paving the "road to hell with good intentions".
But that begs many questions. For instance ...
May 12, 2021 | permalink
[An email response to a question from a community member in India, exploring the role of prayer.]
Namaste Nipun-bhai, I attended Sunday's prayer circle. It was so nourishing to listen and experience prayers from different religions and countries.Thanks for your note and your thoughtful reflections. I'm sorry to hear of your mother, but I'm glad that she's doing better.
But I have been holding a question about prayer for a very long time, and I wanted to ask your thoughts about it. When we are unwell, aren't we reaping the fruits of actions of this or past life? (I am sorry to say this out loud, because I know it sounds insensitive.) In that case, how do my praying for an unwell person, help them. Isn't their illness/health issue predestined? Can my prayers change someone's fate?
My mother aged 72 yrs was Covid positive on April 3 [...] Through all her health issues I, my immediate family, cousins, aunts, friends, neighbors were praying for her. I understand when I pray it brings me lots of peace. It felt very soothing when everyone was praying for my mother, but does that peace and wellness reach the ill person?
I have had this query for a very long time. It has strongly popped now and I wondered how do you think about this?
Feb 24, 2021 | permalink
[Gross National Happiness group in Bhutan arranged a recent conversation, and when they asked about some questions I've been holding, I shared few of these points below.]