It Felt A Bit Like The Mafia :)

It was morning, 9AM. All these cars lined up outside our retreat center, but none of them entered. They were waiting for their leader to arrive. :) First of all, it’s amazing that they all woke up so early, and on top of that, to have this kind of discipline. One gets curious. :)

They are hundred elected leaders of a network of colleges with a population of 850,000 students. Within a couple day notice, they can galvanize an army of 10 thousand volunteers. They run the college. Their top-down leadership style is evident, but today, Jayesh-bhai, Anarben and I are engaging with them. We rarely do such events together, but this event warranted the full fire power. :)

To set some context, before our formal time together, some of them were telling me stories of how they have slapped their professors, burned down buildings, changed the exams schedules according to their whims, and even beat up the chancellor. Of course, they have their own rationales for violence and feel justified in doing their bit for the social change they wish for. :)

Jayeshbhai started by setting the context as he always does -- he uses skillful words but his energetic aikido is even more masterful. Anarben introduced me, and then I shared: "If you want to be daring, wonderful. But first we must explore what is truly gutsy. Violence is nowhere nearly as gutsy as love." Cue Pancho stories. Some personal stories. Everyday stories with 21-day challenge. Then, Anarben explored some edges of leadership -- things that they had never spoken about. All three of us were in effortless harmony. Throughout the time, pin-drop silence.

With the field set, we then let go of the reins. We asked them to take over the mic. Given that these are public leaders, they had no problem with that. :) One of them spoke about doing acts of kindness in his village; another spoke about treating women as our sisters (earlier I had confronted them about how they were 100 men in the room and not a single woman); another spoke about reconnecting with their roots in the villages. When some of them spoke, others made fun of them -- which was a sign that they all felt comfortable. If we sensed things slightly going off track, we'd nudge it back. Stories continued. The ambiance kept building.



At one point, their main leader goes up and says, "Hey guys, I want make a public vow in front of all of you today. I'm going to stop drinking." Whoa. In response to a bunch of smirks in the audience, he said, "No really. That's why I'm saying it in front of all of you. I dare you to catch me drinking from this point." Then, he goes one step further: "I dare you guys to step up to the plate. I'm going to pass around this plate. Put all your cigarettes, drugs and alcohol in it." Coming from him, it wasn't a request -- but an order. :) Perhaps some might've thought that it was a scripted thing -- but it was actually completely spontaneous! He goes on to explain, "Look, a leader is only as strong as his army. If we are all doped out, we can't do anything, and I can't do anything." And so the plate went around and people emptied their pockets.

To conclude, after 3 hours, Jayeshbhai passed around a Smile Deck, and each of them picked a card and read the act of kindness idea that was printed on it. They each decided to do their act that very day. They were even keen to do a 21-day kindness challenge. Another leader stood up and offered unexpected gratitude at the end -- "I can honestly say this on behalf of everyone, I don't think we've ever had a day like this in our life. Can we do this once every month?"

At one point, I had asked them about future career directions, and 100% of them raised their hands for politics. These are the next generation's leaders, and yet no one has held space with them for a deep exploration on leadership, love or transformation. A bit sad. But how amazing that people like Jayeshbhai and Anarben are able to build such bridges.

We all served food together, while I continued to be amazed at the extent of their mafia-like modus operandi -- "Chief, I have exams at 1AM. Can I go?" "Nah, just stay." "But exam?" "I'll take care of it." LOL. :)

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